OCD isn’t random or illogical. It is a comprehensible, logical strategy (avoidance and compulsion) aimed at preventing the Core Fear. Recovering from OCD requires recognizing that you are employing a strategy that doesn’t work, and learning that you have the ability to make different choices that lead to feeling better.
Put another way, recovering from OCD requires developing a sense of agency, or control, over the choice to engage — or not to engage — in avoidance and compulsion.
The language we use to talk about OCD is therefore very important. I believe that we need to use language that enhances an individual’s sense of agency, and avoid language that undermines it.
I believe that we undermine a sense of agency when we:
- Talk about OCD as an external force with its own agency*
- Talk about OCD as random or illogical
- Use language that denies that the individual has control of their behavior
We enhance a sense of agency when we:
- Talk about OCD in terms of an individual’s own behaviors
- Talk about OCD as a comprehensible and logical strategy
- Use language that emphasizes that the individual has control of their behavior
Here are some examples of language that undermines agency:
- The OCD wants you to…
- The OCD made you…
- Can’t stop…
- Couldn’t…
- Had to…
Alternatives include:
- You were really scared so you…
- You chose not to take the chance that…
- You worried about the possibility that…
- You knew that in all likelihood… but you remained aware of the risk that…
- You were afraid to do it because…
- You chose to…
The above is not intended to minimize how terrifying it is for someone with OCD to make certain behavioral choices; it’s simply intended to emphasize that they are making certain choices because of their fear, and that they can make other, healthier choices in spite of it.
*I am not objecting to labeling a person’s overall condition as OCD, or saying that certain experiences are common among people with OCD